Pirates Of The Caribbean Christmas Carols
by invisiblemirage
Summary: A collection of hilarious POTC Christmas carols to sing when you want a new Christmas carol. Post wherever, just give me credit.
1. The 12 Piratical Days Of Christmas

_A.N: Between all the verses, for the rest of the carols, there are zeros, because when I upload it, the format gets messed up. **But if you have any songs you want me to do, tell me, and I will do the very best I can to do that song for you!!**_

XOXOXOXO invisiblemirage

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On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

A rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Two reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Three dead man's chests

Two reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Six Aztec gold medallions

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Seven Letters of Marque

Six Aztec gold medallions

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Eight dogs with keys

Seven Letters of Marque

Six Aztec gold medallions

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Nine Pieces of Eight

Eight dogs with keys

Seven Letters of Marque

Six Aztec gold medallions

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two Reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Ten magnificent garden parties

Nine Pieces of Eight

Eight dogs with keys

Seven Letters of Marque

Six Aztec gold medallions

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two Reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Eleven peanuts

Ten magnificent garden parties

Nine Pieces of Eight

Eight dogs with keys

Seven Letters of Marque

Six Aztec gold medallions

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two Reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.

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On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me

Twelve heart's desire compasses

Eleven peanuts

Ten magnificent garden parties

Nine Pieces of Eight

Eight dogs with keys

Seven Letters of Marque

Six Aztec gold medallions

Five cursed monkeys

Four keys to the chest

Three dead man's chests

Two Reasons not to burn the rum

And a rum bottle in a palm tree.


	2. Deck The Pearl

Deck the Pearl with boughs of holly

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Tis the season the ship must be jolly

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Drink we now our rum and lots of it!

Fa la la, la la la la, la la la la

Sing the ancient pirate carol!

Fa la la la la, la la la la!

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See the blazing, rum burning forest

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Strike a match and join the chorus!

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Follow Jack in merry measure

Fa la la, la la la, la la la

While he tells of Isle du Muerta's treasure!

Fa la la la la, la la la la

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Deck the Pearl wit boughs of holly

Fa la la la la, la la la la

Now come make all pirates jolly

Fa la la, la la la, la la la la

Sing a joyous "Yo Ho!" together

Fa la la, la la la, la la la

Make sure Elizabeth doesn't fall in the water!

Fa la la la la, la la la la

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Deck the deck with a very large tree!

Fa la la la la, la la la la

We'll make it perfect for Jack, Will and me!

Fa la la, la la la, la la la

Barbossa brought apples and Gibbs has rum

Fa la la la, la la la la

It'll be pirate Christmas fun!

Fa la la la la, la la la la!


	3. There's No Place Like The Caribbean

There's no place like the Black Pearl for the holidays

Cuz no matter how far your ship goes

If you long for thr Caribbean sun and a friendly face

For Christmas, you gotta be on the sweet Black Pearl

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Met a pirate from the Grenadines

He was sailin' for Port Royal and some homehade rum

Now the Port Royal folks are travelin'

Down to Tortuga's sunny shores

From the Atlantic to Pacific

The East India ships are _terrific_

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There's no place like Tortuga for the holidays

For the holidays you can't beat the Pearl and rum!

And there's no place like Tortuga

To find a friendly face like Jacks!

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Met a captain from England

He was headed to the good old Cari

To see his baby girl

And the Cari pirates are sailin' for The Bahama's sunny shores

To catch up with old friends and maybe meet some more

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There's no place like Elizabeth's for the holidays!

Her rum-flavored cookies

And Will's Christmas tree

No matter how far the wind blows

And no matter how far away you roam

If you long for rum cookies and Will's smiling face

For the holidays you can't beat the Caribbean

For the holidays you know

You can't beat your sweet, Caribbean home!!


	4. Jack The Cursed Monkey

_**A/N: **Thanks for the idea for this chapter go to : icestar14 . Thanks for the suggestion!_

You know the dog with the keys,

Barbossa and Jack

Will and Elizabeth

Pintel and Regetti at that

Tia Dalma and AnaMaria

But do you recall

Jack the Monkey at all?

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Jack the Cursed Monkey

Had a very pretty gold piece

And if you ever saw it

You would even say it calls

All of the other pirates (Especially Captain Jack)

Used to shoot, laugh, and call him names

They never let cursed Jackie

Play any pirate games

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Then one foggy sailing eve

Barbossa came to say

"Little Jack, with your piece so bright,

Help me find the last one tonight."

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Then how the pirates loved Jack,

And they shouted out, "We're free!

Jack, the cursed Monkey,

You'll go down in pirate history!"


	5. Jingle Pirates

_A/N: Thanks for the idea for the last this song go to: omgxiixluvxhc. Thanks!! _

Dashing through the water

In a ship as black as night

Over the waves we go

Shouting all the way

A pirate's life for me- Yo Ho!

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Bells on the rail ring

Rum making spirits bright

What fun it is to sail and sing

A Christmas song tonight

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Jingle bells, jingle bells

Drink rum all the way

Yo-Ho- what fun it is to sail

With Jack and Will today

Jingle bells, jingle bells

Sing on the Pearl all the way

To Tortuga or Singapore

Is where we head today!

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Jingle bells, Norrington smells

Lizzie laid an egg

Beckett's carriage-mobile lost a wheel

And Tia Dalma learned ballet!


	6. Last Christmas: Regetti and Calypso

_A/N: Special Thanks to Florencia7 for this idea!!!_

Last Christmas, Regetti gave Calypso his heart

And the very next day, she gave it away.

This year, to save himself from tears, he'll give it to someone special. . .

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Last Christmas, he gave Calypso his heart

Only to know she loved Davy Jones

He thought, "She loves me!"

But she only needed him so she could be free.

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Very carefully, maybe even shy

He kept his distance, but her pretty skin still caught his eye.

"Tell me, Calypso, do you recognize me?

Well, it's been a while. . . it doesn't surprise me."

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_Merry Christmas_. He wrapped it up and gave it

With a note saying "I love you.": He meant it

When he saw her give a match to Jones,

He thought, "What a fool I've been!"

But if she kissed him now, he knows she'd fool him again.

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Last Christmas, Regetti gave Calypso his heart

Not Lizzie, not the maid, who he met with a start

This year, he decides without fear, he'll give it to AnaMaria.

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Last Christmas, Calypso broke his heart

And now poor Regetti has something to say

"This year, on Tortuga's shores,

I'll tell AnaMaria I love her forever more."

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A crowded ship, crew mates with tired eyes

He hides from Calypso and her soul stealing eyes

She's locked in the brig, still catching his eye

He thought she was a lover to rely on

But she thought of him as a shoulder to cry on

A friend to discover with piracy in his heart

A man undercover, but she tore him apart

Now he has AnaMaria

Calypso will never fool him again

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Last Christmas, Regetti gave AnaMaria his heart

He grinned when she kissed him right from the start

This year, Regetti sheds no secret tears

He's found someone special

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The next Christmas, they had been apart

Serving on different ships, reuniting from the start

He knows she is someone who takes away his fears

He's found someone special

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These friends had discovered the fires in their hearts

They had been undercover

But are no longer apart

Regetti found something special . . .

Special. . .

Special. . .


	7. Sailing Sleigh Ride

_A/N: Special Thanks to Pretty Lil Pirate for this idea!!_

Just hear the bells on the sails jinglin' and ring-ting-tinglin' too

Come on it's sunny Caribbean weather and the sailors want to sail with you

The waves are rollin' and Governor is callin' yoo-hoo

But they say it's lovely weather for a nice sail together with you

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Heave ho, Heave ho, heave ho let's go. . . let's sail to some Port's show

We're sailing in ultimate freedom you know

Hoist the sails up Will thinks it's grand

Just to hold Lizzie's hand

We're sailing along singing songs

Hoping to find a wintery Christmas land!

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Lizzie's cheeks are red and rosy

And comfy cosy is she

Snuggled with Will together

Like a Turner and Swann should be

Let's take that new path before us

And sing a lovely carol in chorus

Come on it's beautiful weather

Will and Elizabeth are together

With you

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There's a birthday party at the home of Norrington

We'll see his mum and visit her other son

They'll be singing Christmas carols with out a single stop

At the fireplace in time with the popcorn's pop-

Pop! Pop!

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There's a warm and happy feeling no shillings in the world can buy

When the give out the rum-cake and the apple cider goes by

The men are nearly a picture print of Tortuga- oh my!

These are the wonderful things we remember all through our lives!

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Do you hear sleigh bell jinglin' and ring-ting-tinglin' too?

It's flawless weather and Will's got a surprise for his boo

The snow is fallin' and the Governor's callin' yoo-hoo

The snow sparkles and Will's got a present for his boo

They're snuggled up close together in a horse drawn sleigh for two

Will drives the horses and softly kisses her lips

It's lovely sleighing weather

Will and Elizabeth are together

Just like two birds of a feather should do

_A/N: Merry Christmas, everyone!! May God Bless you!! I'm afraid that's it untill next Christmas, unless you want me to do it year round. Let me know!!! (I'll always take requests!!) __**MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!**_


	8. Grinches of the Caribbean

You're a mean one Davy Jones

You really are heartless.  
You're as slimy as a squid,  
You're as charming as an eel.  
Mr. Jones.

You're an evil undead creature

With a nasty lobster claw.

You're a foul one, Mr. Jones

You're a deadly loose cannon.  
Your tentacles smell vile  
Your soul deathly black.  
Davy Jones.

I wouldn't join your crew for a the treasure in the world!!.

You're a vile one, Mr. Mercer  
You have evil in your smile.  
You have all the tender sweetness  
Of a seasick crocodile.  
Mr. Mercer

Given the choice between the two of you  
I'd take the seasick crocodile.

You're a monster, Cutler Beck.  
Your face matches your heart.  
You plot some very cruel plans,  
You kill for "good business.  
Lord Beckett.

The three words that best describe you,  
are, and I quote: "Ugly. Horrid. Wretch!"

The crew's a rotter, Mr. Jones.  
They're full of blood and gore and yuck!.  
They do not bath, oh how they look!.

With ugly blotchy faces,  
Captain Jones

These Grinches are an appalling dump heap overflowing  
with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable  
rubbish imaginable,  
Making all good pirates look bad!

These are the grinches.  
Of the Caribbean.  
These evil heartless demons

Don't know how to sail a ship.  
Those Grinches!!

These are the grinches of the Caribbean.  
I would bet they don't even celebrate Christmas!!

_A/N: Soooooo sorry about the delayed updates!!!!! It's been everything from no time to computer trouble, to groundings and getting sick!!!!!! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and my apologizes for all this slow update stuff. Thanks for being such great POTC fanfic fans!!!! 3 _


	9. All I Want For Christmas

I don't want a lot for Christmas  
There is just one thing I need  
But, it won't fit with the presents  
Underneath the Christmas tree  
I just want it for my own  
More than Jack could ever know  
He could make my wish come true  
All I want for Christmas is the Pearl

I don't want too much for Christmas  
There is just one thing I need  
A bigger better gift than what's

Underneath the Christmas tree  
I don't need to hang my "peg leg"  
There upon the fireplace  
Captain Jack won't make me happy  
With a Monkey on Christmas day

This is more than just a ship

Supernaturally give Jones the slip

Jack, my wish come true  
All I want for Christmas is the Pearl

Ohh, Baby ...My Baby...  
You know I love you  
So Captain Jack, ...My Captain  
You know I'd do anything

For my ship, ... My Baby

This could be the very best Christmas

One I remember forevermore

I'm just gonna keep on hoping  
Subtly letting Jack know  
This ship means so much to me

For it I'd do anything

I won't even ask to stay

Jack can slay Jones himself

Please, my Jack, Let's not fight

Sailing with me into the night

What more can I do, babyall I want for Christmas is that ship from you  
Ohh, Baby ...My Baby...  
You know I love you  
So baby, baby...My Baby  
You know I love you  
So baby, baby...My Baby

All the candles are burning  
So brightly on the sea  
And the sound of ocean's waves fills the sea air

And all pirates are singing  
I hear those gunshots ringing  
Jack won't you let me  
Have the ship I really need  
Won't you please bring my Pearl to me

I don't want a lot for Christmas  
This is all I'm asking for  
I just wanna sail my own ship  
Avoiding every Commodore

I wanna be Captain on my own  
More than you could ever know  
Let me stop being blue

All I want for Christmas is the Pearl  
I wish for it, I start to moan

The feel of the helm I'd like to know  
Make my dream come true  
All I want for Christmas is your ship

Ohh, Jack ...My Captain...  
You know I love you  
So baby, baby...My Baby  
You know I love you  
So please, baby...My love


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